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| Loving the guy on the left refusing to move. |
Now John has arrived with his family I have been able to leave the house without being a total loner...we went down the Gold Coast and stopped off at Surfers Paradise for the day. I can only really describe it is Australia's equivalent to Ayia Napa or something like that. I don't think a place that has a kinky sex shop named 'Condom Kingdom' with a 6 foot tall smiling plastic condom at its door can really claim any form of dignity, similarly to the twig girls walking round in gold hot pants and cowboy hats!
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| Skittles got pretty jealous when he saw this, he thought me and the condom were now good friends. |
The day itself was actually amazing. I make it sound a pretty shoddy place but the beach was gorgeous, the sea was clean and my banter as always was pretty unreal. If you ever go I recommend you stop for food at the Surf Life Saving Club! Its on the beach front and has a $10 menu (very cheap compared to most places) I tend to have a habit of rating days out purely on the food...so after a decent steak sandwich and tub of chocolate ice cream I can happily say I would go back.
The following day I tagged along (call me Billy) with the Cunninghams on their day out to Steve Irwin's Australia Zoo! We arrived just in time to see the main show....a brilliant display of trained birds followed by the Croc! It was pretty awesome, although there was a general undertone of disappointment through the crowd when the trainers didnt wrestle it to the ground.
We fed the Kangaroos (John and his Dad hilariously got bitten), stroked the koalas (chuffed kid) and saw the trainers working with the tigers!! Great day out and a solid 8/10 awarded to Mr&Mrs C for their packed lunch abilities.
Photo montage of my day.
After two decent days, we were pushing our luck for a third on the trot. We set off with all intentions to go for a surfing lesson somewhere up Sunshine Coast. If we had put more than 2 brain cells of thought into it we would have returned to surfers paradise as the trade kind of goes in the name and I could be guaranteed a decent steak sandwich...We stopped off at a service station, the boys had a maccies, I opted out and got a yoghurt muesli bar. Now, at this point I should have thought back to previous occasions I turned down the Big Mac meal made large and just taken the 3000 calories on the chin...our day did not end well. The tourist information people seemed very keen on a place called Bribie Island. It was half an hour away from where we were and we were also told that we could have a sweet go at surfing. SOLD to the idiot with the muesli bar...
I will just provide a short quote from the tourist guide to the Island:-
"Remember those carefree holidays as a child playing on the beach in the soft white sand and having locally caught fish and chips for lunch- that is still what Bribie has to offer plus so much more" They were correct about the "so much more" part....
We turned up to a place I wouldn't even send my gran, even she would be 20 years shy of the average age! If you are keen on assisted euthanasia..then this is the place for you!! We lasted about 10 minutes before we returned to the car feeling our souls slowly being drained from our bodies. The Harry Potter fans out there will probably relate to it as an experience with a dementor. The drive after was painful and I very nearly throttled my best friend on several occasions. It may seem like I am exaggerating quite how bad my day was but when the hunger pains kicked in and I had been driving for 4 and a half hours to visit the retirement capital of australia...its safe to say I was on a new level of emotional breakdown.
Moral of the story?
Should have got a Big Mac meal made large
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